Category: humor

United States Declares War on Three New Fronts in Three Continents

Washington, D.C. (Easter Week 2018) – Alleged Christian Donald J. Trump is now declaring new wars in three continental fronts: East Asia, Central America, and the Middle East – versus Red China, Syria, and ‘caravans’ of North and South Americans headed north, supposedly to work in agricultural jobs that U.S. citizens will not do.

The renewed ‘Tariff War’ targeted at the socioeconomics of over one billion people may be the toughest to win. Those that know history recall bankruptcies as well as lost ‘military’ battles the U.S. has waged against immigration and Middle East people.

Those that understand American government see irony of how any President can declare war without an act of Congress.

Also remarkable is, as the National Director of National Security (DHS), a.k.a. Homeland [no relation to German Nazis] described, no details to the White House Press Corp how, when, why, and at what financial cost the southwest border war will entail.

Perhaps it would help if presidential advisors would provide planning assistance for the federal government?

Featured Image -- 172

More planning and less tweeting may improve the United States’ odds of winning any international conflict?!?

As my old friend Bob would say, “Lord have mercy!”

Timing in sports, stand-up comedy, business, cooking, and international politics is very important. May the Lord spare US from three losses, poor jokes, bankruptcy, world disasters, death, and another burned pot roast.

 

copyright MMXVIII

Max’s Scout Services & Communications, LLC

[ for musement only ]

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“Sweet 16” Results into “Final 4”

I don’t feel another Loyola win or two in the tournament would be an upset.

For further analysis, check out:
https://maxsscoutservicesllc.wordpress.com/2018/03/20/they-call-it-the-sweet-sixteen-of-march-madness-a-k-a-the-big-dance/

South Region:
Kansas State Wildcats 24-11 (+3.5) vs.
Kentucky Wildcats 26-10

Loyola-Chicago Ramblers 30-5 (+2.5) vs.
University of Nevada at Reno 29-7

West Region:
Michigan Wolverines 30-7 (-3.5) vs.
Texas A&M Aggies 22-12

Florida State Seminoles 21-11 (+2.5) vs.
Gonzaga U. Bulldogs 32-4

yogiBerra
. . . as Yogi would say, “It is not over until it’s over.”
m madness bracket

East Region:
Purdue U. Boilermakers 30-6(-1.5) vs.
Texas Tech Red Raiders 26-9

Villanova Wildcats 32-4 (-2.5) vs.
West Virginia Mountaineers 26-10

Midwest Region:
Clemson Tigers 25-9 (+4.5)
U. of Kansas Jayhawks 29-7

Duke U. Blue Demons 28-7 (-7.5) vs.
Syracuse U. Orangemen 23-13

= = =

* * * for musement only * * *
copyright 2018 – Max’s Scout Services & Communications of the Americas –

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Trump Administration “Making Progress”

Classic Satire Made by Susan Keller:

I can’t believe I’m saying this, but it looks like Rump is actually making America great again. Just look at the progress made since the election: LOL

1. Unprecedented levels of ongoing civic engagement.
2. Millions of Americans now know who their state and federal representatives are without having to google.
3. Millions of Americans are exercising more. They’re holding signs and marching every week.…
4. Alec Baldwin is great again. Everyone’s forgotten he’s kind of a jerk.

pres-politics
5. The Postal Service is enjoying the influx cash due to stamps purchased by millions of people for letter and postcard campaigns.
6. Likewise, the pharmaceutical industry is enjoying record growth in sales of anti-depressants.
7. Millions of Americans now know how to call their elected officials and know exactly what to say to be effective.
8. Footage of town hall meetings is now entertaining.
9. Tens of millions of people are now correctly spelling words like emoluments, narcissist, fascist, misogynist, holocaust and cognitive dissonance.
10. Everyone knows more about the rise of Hitler than they did last year.
11. Everyone knows more about legislation, branches of power and how checks and balances work.
12. Marginalized groups are experiencing a surge in white allies.
13. White people in record numbers have just learned that racism is not dead. (See #6)
14. White people in record numbers also finally understand that Obamacare IS the Affordable Care Act.
15. Stephen Colbert’s “Late Night” finally gained the elusive #1 spot in late night talk shows, and Seth Meyers is finding his footing as today’s Jon Stewart.
16. “Mike Pence” has donated millions of dollars to Planned Parenthood since Nov. 9th.
17. Melissa FREAKING McCarthy.
18. Travel ban protesters put $24 million into ACLU coffers in just 48 hours, enabling them to hire 200 more attorneys. Lawyers are now heroes.
19. As people seek veracity in their news sources, respected news outlets are happily reporting a substantial increase in subscriptions, a boon to a struggling industry vital to our democracy.
20. Live streaming court cases and congressional sessions are now as popular as the Kardashians.
21. Massive cleanup of Facebook friend lists.
22. People are reading classic literature again. Sales of George Orwell’s “1984” increased by 10,000% after the inauguration. (Yes, that is true. 10,000%. 9th grade Lit teachers all over the country are now rock stars.)
23. More than ever before, Americans are aware that education is important. Like, super important.
24. Now, more than anytime in history, everyone believes that anyone can be President. Seriously, anyone.
– Susan Keller

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NFL 7/8 Parlay Wagers Accepted

 

Max’s Weekly NFL Teaser Card **

Wager $ 50.00 on a 7 or 8-team Parlay and win at 40 to 1 odds

 

Underdogs galore to choose from:

  • Take Indianapolis Colts (+5.5; over 46.5) at the Minnesota Twin Vikings
  • Take Detroit Lions (+3.5, over/under 40.5) at the New Jersey Giants
  • Your choice – Tennessee Tuxedo Titans (+5.5, o/u 41.5) at the stumbling Kansas City Indian Chiefs
  • Buffalo Bills (-10.5; o/u 41.5) at home versus the hapless Cleveland Indian Browns
  • Your choice / pick ‘em – Philly Eagles (5.5; o/u 40.5) at the Baltimore Ravens
  • Houston Texans (-7.5, o/u 39.5) at home versus the Jacksonville Jaguars
  • Pittsburgh Steelers (-3.5, o/u 39.5) at the Cincinnati Bengals
  • Green Bay Packers (-7.5, o/u 39.5) at the cold Bears’ Soldiers Field in Chicago

**  Send your wager to DaileySun@outlook.com and receive a confirmation prior to 9:00 p.m. PST Saturday, December 17, 2016

Obama and Bo the Dog
President Playing Football with Bo

Later games:

  • New Orleans Saints (+1.5, o/u 50.5) at the disappointing Arizona (ought to move back to St. Louis) Cardinals
  • Atlanta Falcons (-13.5, o/u 50.5) hosting the sad San Francisco 49ers (Niners are now actually from Santa Clara and owned by the sinking Jed York family)
  • Denver Broncos (+2.5, o/u 44.5) hosting the cooling down New England Patriots
  • Oakland Raiders! (-3.5, o/u 43.5) at the struggling last-place San Diego Chargers

NBC game: Tampa Bay Buccaneers (-7.5, o/u 45.5) at the Dallas Cowgirls

MNF: Carolina Panthers (+7.5; o/u 50.5) at the Washington Indian Redskins

 

Copyright 2016

Max’s Scout Services & Communications of the Americas, LLC

[ for musement only ]

← Back

Thank you for your response. ✨

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Irony is Killing US – Four Kinds of Politics Identified by VP Joe Biden

8-8-16

Vice President Joe Biden and his father have identified four kinds of American politics:

  • Labor Politics
  • Religious Politics
  • Regular Politics
  • Cancer Politics

In a concerted effort to get everyone involved and cooperating on-the-same-page, the Vice President [and I wish Joe would become our 45th President] has coined a “Moon Shots Program” for the Cancer Community.

j v
Legendary Basketball Coach Jimmy Valvano

This Cancer Community appears to be operating in its own individualist self-interest. If only researchers, doctors/oncologists, colleges and foundations, patients and their codependents and helpers, philanthropists, and others would work together to find cures for many types of cancer, we Americans who suffer – and the human race – would be better off.

Joe is not far off by comparing the American effort during the 1960s to a current emphasis on cancer solutions and prevention for our current decade, which has only four years remaining.

The urgency is now to get egos and financial incentives directed toward non-selfish results . . . and hurry before my best friend dies!

As national champion Coach Jimmy Valvano said weeks before his death, “Don’t give up, don’t ever give up!”

= = =

reposted essay – copyright MMXVI

Max’s Scout Services and Communications of the Americas, LLC

Woodside, California U.S.A.

Obama and Bo the Dog
President Playing Football with Bo;

Too bad he cannot run for president again.

Obama was good at running away from Republicans, too.

America does have a choice in this election: Vote Libertarian or Green Party

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Last Night in “Glentucky” – New Year’s – 2000 Hours – Five Degrees Above Farenheit – Waxing to a Full Moon on 1-5-2015

I am warm inside a bed and breakfast close to downtown Glenwood Springs, Colorado. My friends who I have met in the regional homeless community are either staying in the basement of a Christian church in West Glenwood or in the basement of a Catholic church in Aspen. Each overnight program has many more than 20 participants. This does not include the multitude of families and children who locally receive food assistance. Dozens of other homeless people are ‘camping out’ even though the location they end up sleeping at may be a criminal defense.

Glenwood Springs Amtrak Station near the Colorado River
Glenwood Springs Amtrak Station near the Colorado River

In “Glentucky” alone, over 60 adults attended tonight’s Extended Table dinner hour in the basement of the First Methodist Church Tonight it was hosted by St. Mary of the Star Roman Catholic Church of Carbondale, Colorado, which is located about 15 miles south of Glenwood Springs and 25 miles north of Aspen. In Garfield County, there are four towns that serve some evening hot meals. Glenwood Springs and Aspen have daytime shelters for homeless and disadvantaged adults.

I will write more about how it was living almost seven consecutive months in this region of the United States of America. Right now I have to resume my packing… the next freight train going west leaves Glentucky about Noon.

P. S. On 12/31/14, I left a Janzsport backpack in the 1st Methodist Church basement dining room. It had a smartphone, 15 year old address book, passport, banking documents, and other personal effects. I never saw it again.

I tried to contact the church and the town’s homeless daycare center… no luck.

So hard, if not impossible to replace stuff like that.

Less than a week later, I got off the Amtrak train ill. Went to a hospital in Reno.

A day after that, my wallet was pickpocketed across from Harrah’s Casino on Reno’s Virginia Street. [needless to say, in retrospect 2015 sucked!]

Honestly, Reno Nevada = the worst city in the USA to be homeless!

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Get Wise Treasury Dept: Find a More Accomplished American Woman (with a smile)

Woman to Replace the First Secretary of the Treasury and Patriot Alexander Hamilton on the $10 Bill?   

August 31, 2015                                        By:  DaileySun@outlook.com

`                                                                       www.maxsscoutservices/wordpress.com

You may be a registered voter from all 50 states and U.S. Territories

so participate in this national referendum [select the one best answer]:

  • Bessie Coleman (1910s – 1926)
  • Rosa Parks (1960s)
  • Oprah Winfrey (1990s and 2000s)
  • Harriet Tubman (1860s)
  • Maya Angelou (1990s)
  • The First Lady [new design every 4 years]
  • Michelle Obama (2008 – current)
  • Hillary Clinton (1990s – current)
  • Eleanor Roosevelt (1930s – 1963)
  • Saint Mother Elizabeth Ann Seton (1800s – 1821)
  • Catherine McCauley (1900s)
  • Saint Mother Theresa [not an American] (1950s – 1997)
  • A Mirror Image (one will be able to see yourself on the bill)
  • Caitlin (Gold Medalist Bruce) Jenner (1980s – 2010s)
  • Kim Kardasian (2010s)
  • Serena Williams (2010s)
  • Miley Cyrus (2010s)
  • David’s Grandmother (1903 – 1973)
  • Janis Joplin (1960s)
  • Mrs. Santa Claus [perhaps an American icon]
  • Mrs. (Robin Williams) Doubtfire (1993)
  • Martha Washington (1790s)
  • Molly Pitcher (1770s)
  • Florence Nightingale [British] (1850s – 1910)
  • Betsy Ross (1770s)
  • Rosie the Riveter (1940s)
  • Christie Brinkley (current)
  • Jacqueline Kennedy (1960s)
  • Barbara Bush (1990s)
  • Amelia Earhart (1920s)
  • Babe Zacharias (1920s)
  • Jane Pauley (2000s)
  • Juliette Gordon Low (1910s – 1927)
  • Virginia Dare (1587 – 1653)
  • Sandra Day O’Connor (1981 – 2007)
  • write-in  ___________________________________

copyright MMXV –

Max’s Scout Services & Communications of the Americas, LLC –

Woodside, California /

Bloomington, Indiana /

Glenwood Springs, Colorado –

(for musement only)

20140530_113431

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Your Opinion Counts Here – Voice It Until it is Too Late – What Hysterical/Historical American Woman???

Who on the Ten Buck Bill???

Question of the Month: Woman to Replace the First Secretary of the Treasury

Patriot Alexander Hamilton on the $10 Bill?   

                                August 31, 2015

By: DaileySun@outlook.com

`                                                                       www.maxsscoutservices/wordpress.com

You may be a registered voter from all 50 states and U.S. Territories

to participate in this national referendum [select the one best answer]:

Betty/Betsy Coleman (1910s)

Rosa Parks (1960s)

Oprah Winfrey (2000s)

Harriet Tubman (1860s)

Maya Angelu (1990s)

The First Lady [new design every 4 yrs.]

Michelle Obama (current)

Hillary Clinton (current)

Eleanor Roosevelt (1940s)

Mother Elizabeth Seton (1800s)

Catherine McCauley (1900s)

Mother Theresa [not an American}

A Mirror Image (one will be able to see yourself on the bill)

Caitlin (Gold Medalist Bruce) Jenner (2010s)

Kim Kardasian (2010s)

Miley Cyrus (2010s)

David’s Grandmother (1970s)

Janis Joplin (1960s)

Mrs. Santa Claus [perhaps an American icon]

Mrs. (Robin Williams) Doubtfire (1990s)

write-in:  ______________________

Copyright MMXV –

Max’s Scout Services & Communications of the Americas, LLC –

(for musement only)

President Playing Football with Bo
President Playing Football with Bo
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Writer May Be Going Crazy Waiting fo the Right Answer

Ultimatum in Northern Silicon Valley — A Final Solution / Exit Plan / Happy Ending — to Movie Script “Country Corner: Germ Warfare” for the ‘Kathy Bates’ and ‘Debra Winger’ Characters

Sunday Night

Posted by

94025-6526

THE HUNGER STRIKE CONTINUES

 [first posted on Wednesday, February 4, 2015]

[Over Six Months Ago]

Prior to the release of:

  1. “Country Corner Market & Deli vs. Silly-Con Valley” (copyright 2001)
  2. “Country Corner: Germ Warfare” (copyright 2010)  and
  3. “Country Corner: 2020 – A Spaced Odyssey” (copyright 2015)

These female characters should sell their real estate that is within 100 yards (the length of most of a football or soccer field) of the Country Corner Market & Deli of West Menlo Park, Northern California (southern San Mateo County) by the beginning of Stanford Universities and the University of Michigan Wolverines’ football seasons or ELSE . . .

The screenwriters’ hunger strike began today (Saturday, January 24, 2015) before 7:15 a.m. PST.

In addition, the screenwriter will never set foot in this store ever again, unless . . .

Therefore, these two busyiness-meddling, “sexy”, gossiping, perhaps overweight, whatever-else, duh, post-menopausal women MUST sell-out AND leave this fine community that has probably the best deli, best wine selection, best three owners, best family-oriented business, best weather, best busy traffic, and best customers in the (North, South, and Central) Americas.

Failure to do so will result in guilt, anguish, anxiety, danger, and many negative consequences (that largely will be self-inflicted). Yes, you ‘Kathy Bates’.

And yes, you ‘Debra Winger’ character model; mother to the screenwriter’s only child; real-life icon to pre-schoolers.

Screenwriter Plays with Two Dogs at Country Corner Deli & Market

= = = =

copyright MMXV

 – Max’s Scout Services & Communications of The Americas, LLC –

[ for musement only ]

D. A. D. Publishing & Associates (of Bloomington, Southern Indiana and Glentucky Springs, Western Colorado)

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